You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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