I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
