Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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