Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
