what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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