did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
