You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize