Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
