I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
