I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
