Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
