just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
