New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
