But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
