The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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