Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
