Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Boobs are out for the taking
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
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