Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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