More tranny stories later!
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
