Someone shit on the floor
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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