My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
