Say something about gay babies.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
