Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
