we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
