Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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