? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
