Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
