It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm like, not good at living.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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