I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
where are my eyebrows?
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