It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
