I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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