I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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