My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
