She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
