he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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