I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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