yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
