think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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