So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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