im having a threesome with these popsicles
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
