Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
