Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
