on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
