I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
it's like heaven, but drunker
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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