In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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