I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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