Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
