One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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