Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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