got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
