They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
