We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
